5 tips for encouraging others
1) Be Specific
Saying clearly what you appreciate about someone is more effective than giving a general 'you're really great.' Think about something particular that they have done or that they mean to you. Something small and specific is better than something broad and bland.
2) Be Honest
People can instinctively tell if you're being genuine or not. There's no point saying you like something about someone if it's really not true. On the other hand, it's very rare that you can't find something good to say about someone, even if they really get up your nose!
3) Think about what would be meaningful to the other person
It's easy to assume that what we would like to hear is the same as what another person would like, but take a moment to think about it - what is important to the other person? What encouragement would they personally want to hear?
4) Take a moment to listen to your intuition
If you really can't think what to say, don't think - use your intuition about it. Trust the part of yourself that knows things without knowing how you know them. You might find that something comes to you that seems surprising or unusual, but when you offer it to the other person, it really means something to them. How does it work? It's a mystery!
5) Be brave
Sometimes offering encouragement can make us feel vulnerable. It can feel safer to be 'cool' and a bit cynical. But when we offer encouragement we put ourselves in a position where the other person can reject it; and that can be quite painful. Don't be put off by this - if it feels a bit scary to say it, then you're probably doing something right.
Be Encouraged - every Sunday, at St Mary Magdalene Church Newark.
8:00am - reflective | 9:30am - formal, choral | 11:15am - informal, lively | 5pm - traditional, choral